by

Rebecca Somoskey

DeShara burst through the front door and fell into her mother’s arms. "It’s been six weeks and I still don’t have a part," she sobbed. "No one wants a heroine who is skinny as a stick and wears glasses as thick as the bottom of a soda bottle." She took the tissue her mother offered and blew her nose. "Just because I’m the youngest one on the drama team doesn’t mean I can’t do the parts. I might as well quit."

"Remember what I told you last week, Dee?" her mom always used her nickname when they were having their heart to heart talks. "You success is not determined by what’s going on outside of you, but by what’s going on in your heart, between you and the Lord."

"I know, Mom," DeShara admitted. "But that’s so hard to remember when you don’t have any successes.

"Surely some good things are happening to you, dear." Mom said.

"Not anything worth telling." She insisted.

Her mom was quiet a few minutes, then said, "Maybe it would help you to do what I do. I write down every good thing God does for me, or things I do that I am proud of and want to praise Him for. When I get discouraged I go back and read them. That brings them to my remembrance."

"It won’t help," DeShara insisted.

"Try it for a few days and see," Her mom smiled, then hugged DeShara. "Now change your clothes and come help me with dinner. I need your expertise to set a pretty table. We will celebrate your future success with the drama club."

Before she crawled under the covers that night DeShara checked her Bible concordance and found the word remembrance. She turned to Malachi 3:16 and read how the Children of Israel made a book of remembrance when they were in bondage to the Babylonians. It encouraged them while they were in slavery to remember Jerusalem and their God. She found a small notebook in her desk drawer and printed across the cover: "DeShara’s Book of Remembrance". Then she printed on the first page in large letters: ""My success is not determined by what’s going on outside of me, but by what’s going on in my heart, between me and the Lord". On the second page she wrote the date and the words "Thank you Lord for:" then listed two things: 1. Mom’s idea for this book. 2. My expertise to set a pretty table for dinner.

As she closed her eyes she already knew that she wouldn’t give up on getting a part in the next production.

For the next two weeks DeShara wrote down every good thing that happened to her. To her surprise she found she had at least one success every day. Day 1: Made an A on that really hard math test. Day 2: Jeremy Sloan asked me if his mom could pay me to be his math tutor because he’s making D’s. That means extra spending money. Day 3: Dad liked my new hair cut, and so did some of the kid’s at school. Day 4: Finished memorizing the Beattitudes. I’ve been trying for six months. And those were only some of her successes. She spent time praising God for each one and began to feel better about herself.

She also practiced for the next drama club production. Two weeks before tryouts she began spending every spare minute practicing, so when the big day came she knew the entire skit by heart. Surely Mike, the drama coach, would give her a part. But when he called the chosen names her name was skipped over.

She raced home, threw her Book of Remembrance into the trash can and sobbed herself to sleep.

An hour later the ringing of the telephone woke her.

"DeShara," her mom called. "It’s Mike. He wants to speak with you."

DeShara hurried to the phone. Mike had never called before. What could he possibly want? "Hello," she croaked into receiver.

"DeShara, this is Mike. I have a favor to ask of you."

Yeah, right!! She thought. Probably wants me to baby sit the night of the play just because I don’t have a part.

"I’ll try, " she answered. But her heart wasn’t in it.

"I have been watching you since you joined the drama team and I have to say that you are the most dedicated member I have. Besides that, you are good. Today’s tryouts proved that, and I am sorry I couldn’t fit you in. But I didn’t call to apologize. I called to ask you to take the main part in our next production in three months. It’s a story about Jairus’ daughter, and you would be perfect for the part. Do you think you could do it?"

DeShara didn’t remember any of the rest of the conversation except a mumbled, "Sure, I could do it." She had wings and felt like she would surely fly away.